NEW YORK: What drugs are the MTA suits on?

"New Yorker Wants Boycott Of MTA After Fare Hike
One New Yorker has a plan to protest fare increases for buses and subways that are expected to wallop commuters next year: He's calling for a one-day boycott.

Louis Kenny has been passing out fliers calling for a boycott on the day fares are expected to go up June 9, 2009. He says people should walk, take a bike or call in sick to work that day instead of relying on public transportation.

The Metropolitan Transportation Agency says it needs to raise fare revenue by 23 percent because of a massive budget shortfall.

In calling a boycott, Kenny says, ''It's time to show the MTA who really runs New York City's public transportation.'' Kenny says the agency should reinstate the 50-cent fare on the Staten Island ferry and charge more for advertising.

If the proposed budget is approved and the state Legislature doesn't come up with more money for the MTA, the service cuts could go into effect as early as June. In addition to fare hikes, the MTA is expected to slash service, which includes subway lines and bus routes. "

[read the full story here: http://wcbstv.com/topstories/subway.fare.hike.2.871128.html]

Break down of fare hikes:
Pay per ride -> $3 (Originally 2$!)
30 day unlimited -> $105 (Originally 70$)
14 day -> $60
7 day -> $32
Express bus -> $6.25*
Access-a-ride -> $6 (300% increase)
*Students will no longer get half fare on Express buses.

--> Theo: Are you kidding me, economy?! You give 50 gajillion dollars to AIG and they go to the Bahama's the next day, but you can't give 2 billion for New Yorker's everywhere to hate the world a little less? Really?
Well, even so. There are other ways the MTA can get their cash back.

THEO's THEORYS (aka Unused Solutions)

• Number 1: SHUT UP. How much money do they spend on telling us a thousand times to watch the f'n gap? There are signs, announcements, advertisements, commercials, videos, and more! How about this: Stop all of that, and just paint on all the doors and floors and walls "CHECK YA SELF BEFORE YOU WRECK YA' SELF: If You Hurt Yourself Out Of Your Stupidity, Don't Sue Us Because You're Stupid."
  How about that? Bet ya' people will be looking at their feet a lot more when they know they can't make a pretty penny out of being a clumsy doofus head.*
  
• Number 2: BE GREEN. Come now, capital of the world! Big apple of the Atlantic, fashion center of the universe, second only to Paris: Since when have you been so behind on the times??? This is beyond fashionably late. Green is the new black. The new everything! There is so much money to be made! And all the hipsters and hippies from Williamsburg to Chelsea are just dying for the day you get a hip pulse and throw out your diesel trains for some solar powered ones!
  Because, that is something we do have over Paris, sunlight. That could be what puts us in a fashionable first place!
  
• Number 3. KNOW FAIRNESS: TRANSPARENCY IS IN, just ask Britney! Take the money you get and show us where it goes. It's easy. Just be more New Yorker like and whine about all the bills you have to pay. I'm sure its tremendous, for all the fuel to transport 8 million people by bus, taxi, and train. And I haven't even started on all the money it kills every time someone holds open a door. I know!
  We're here for you if you need to talk. We're sure its stressful and costly. Tell us all about it, MTA. We'd love to know where your money goes.
  

In the mean time, let's protest this nonsense here, fbookers:
http://www.facebook.com/event.php?eid=49896765890&ref=nf

Peace and Protest, mo' fo's!
Theo.

PS: It's noted. I need a Thesaurus. Don't even start on that comment, I'm aware :)